Our Gemara on Amud Beis records an epic dispute that took place regarding King David’s lineage. The dispute revolved around whether the prohibition against marrying a Moabite was limited to males or also included females. King David descended from Ruth, a female Moabite convert. One rationale why the females were not prohibited is the verse states:
לֹֽא־יָבֹ֧א עַמּוֹנִ֛י וּמוֹאָבִ֖י בִּקְהַ֣ל ה גַּ֚ם דּ֣וֹר עֲשִׂירִ֔י לֹא־יָבֹ֥א לָהֶ֛ם בִּקְהַ֥ל ה עַד־עוֹלָֽם׃
No Ammonite or Moabite shall be admitted into the congregation of Hashem ; no descendants of such, even in the tenth generation, shall ever be admitted into the congregation of Hashem ,
עַל־דְּבַ֞ר אֲשֶׁ֨ר לֹא־קִדְּמ֤וּ אֶתְכֶם֙ בַּלֶּ֣חֶם וּבַמַּ֔יִם בַּדֶּ֖רֶךְ בְּצֵאתְכֶ֣ם מִמִּצְרָ֑יִם וַאֲשֶׁר֩ שָׂכַ֨ר עָלֶ֜יךָ אֶת־בִּלְעָ֣ם בֶּן־בְּע֗וֹר מִפְּת֛וֹר אֲרַ֥ם נַהֲרַ֖יִם לְקַֽלְלֶֽךָּ׃
because they did not meet you with food and water on your journey after you left Egypt, and because they hired Balaam son of Beor, from Pethor of Aram-naharaim, to curse you.—
The reason offered is the Moabites were cruel in not coming out to greet the Jewish wayfarers with bread and water. Therefore, the Gemara argues that since, for modesty purposes, it is not the way of women to run out to the borders, the women cannot be held liable for the misdeeds of their male counterparts. The Gemara quotes various classic verses indicating the virtue of women being low key and modest, and avoiding activities outside of the home. (Of course, though the standard of modesty and ways to express it has changed dramatically, the concept and value of modesty should not be discarded. But that’s not today’s discussion.)
There is something odd about this Gemara. Why would they apply Jewish standards of modesty and Jewish scripture to Moabite women? That is, why would the Jewish value of modesty and our own scriptural requirements compel the Moabite women to hold back from bringing water to the border? How does this excuse them from the sadism of their male brethren? Are we to believe they too, were too modest to consider bringing water out to the Jewish people.
The simple answer is that modesty is innate, cultural value for many ancient people. The scriptural proofs were simply what is called a “giluy milsa”. That is, revealing a self understood concept. The problem with this answer is that the Seven Nations were known for their sexual immorality (See Vayikra 18:3 and Numbers 25). Perhaps we canstill argue that a people can have an overall value of modesty and then have loose and immoral people as a subpopulation. For example, the youth could be promiscuous and the older generation settled down, or you have regions with different customs. This can be compared to contemporary times where there is a strong middle America with values such as modesty and charity, while in the large urban centers more promiscuity and less adherence to traditional values.
Another possible answer is that if they had an excuse that they could have been acting out of modesty, then it is enough so as not to indict them. Thus, even if many of the Moabite women did not bring the water out of indifference and cruelty, since some withheld out of modesty the entire group escaped being rejected, unlike the Moabite men who had no excuse whatsoever.
My last thought is a clever quip, but still might be true. When it comes to the Yetzer Hara, all of the sudden people get very frum. For example, if there is important and serious information that needs to be disclosed about a Shidduch, suddenly everyone is mehadrin min hamehadrin on Hilchos L’shon Hora.
Similarly, I wonder if the psychological process for the Moabite women, who indeed weren’t too modest, still involved a thought about modesty. When they were presented with the moral challenge of, “should we greet our Jewish brothers and sisters with water?”, they had one more excuse than the men. For the Moabite men it was strictly indifferent cruelty toward tired wayfarers who were their brothers. However, the Moabite women had an excuse. In the back of their mind, they are thinking, “I don’t like these Jews. But, they really need water and they are my brothers, so maybe I should still bring them water. Oh, but wait a minute, it’s really not so modest. Ok, I’ll stay home.”
There is nothing more frum than the Yetzer Hora!
Translations Courtesy of Sefaria, except when, sometimes, I disagree with the translation 
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